September 30: Be Careful

Toby was in the basement this morning watching Super Why while I started to climb out of the pile of laundry that built up this last week, and I caught the tale end of the story. Wyatt's super story answer to his problem was "be careful." He said that it was his dad's motto, and his dad was always telling him to "be careful!" As he was going outside to run and play, he said to his dad, "I know, be careful," proudly exclaiming that this was now his motto, too.

That bothered me, and at first I wasn't sure why. I probably say that to my kids, especially my wild boys, all the time and don't think twice about it. In fact, I know I do. I'm not sure that I will anymore, though.

Be careful. Play it safe. Don't take risks. Be cautious. Don't run too fast or climb too high. Don't test the limits. Adventure is overrated. Passivity is best.

Be careful.

Is that really the message we want our little boys, who will grow up one day to become men, to embrace? Do we really want careful men? Should that be their motto? Really?? At the end of their lives, will being a "careful" man be on the list of qualities that are praiseworthy? Do little girls, daydreaming about their future husband, wish and pray in the core of their being for a "careful" man? I don't think so. And maybe it's because I've been reading Captivating, which is the female version of Wild at Heart, by John Eldredge, but being "careful" seems to go against the very heart of a man, and God.

Were the heros in Braveheart, Gladiator, and Saving Private Ryan "careful?" If they were, there wouldn't have been a movie. Was Jim Elliot careful? Or George Mueller? Or Jesus? Sharing the gospel with violent, foreign tribes, depending on the Lord to provide food for the orphanage each day, and dying a horrific death on the cross for everyone in all of history is Anything. But. Careful. God didn't create men to be careful, and ultimately we wouldn't want them to be! He created them to be brave, to fight battles, and to rescue the beauty. If they don't, it throws everything off balance.

Let me ask you a question: Where is Adam, while the serpent is tempting Eve? He's standing right there: "She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it" (Gen. 3:6). The Hebrew for "with her" means right there, elbow to elbow. Adam isn't away in another part of the forest; he has no alibi. He is standing right there, watching the whole thing unravel. What does he do? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. He says not a word, doesn't lift a finger...He won't risk, he won't fight, and he won't rescue Eve. Our first Father--the first real man--gave in to paralysis. He denied his very nature and went passive. And every man after him, every son of Adam, carries in his heart now the same failure. Every man repeats the sin of Adam, every day. We won't risk, we won't fight, and we won't rescue Eve. We are truly a chip off the old block. (John Eldredge, Wild at Heart)

Now, don't misunderstand me: I'm not saying to allow your boys to be careless and run buck wild. As with everything else in life, there's a balance. It's important to exercise wisdom and discretion in our parenting and in our actions: just because it could be done doesn't mean it should be done. The goal is to communicate to our boys a realistic belief in their ability to soar in areas of giftedness and to surrender to God, allowing Him to lead the way.

Our boys and future men will never be able to live to the fullest or experience God's best for their lives if they are concerned about being careful. If we drill the message into our little boys that they always need to be careful, then they will never test the limits to find out what they are truly capable of. They will never be willing to fully trust God with their very breath, life and future, because let's face it, trusting God is a big risk. But God is brave, a fierce warrior, and He is good--He is worthy of our trust and our very life. And He made man in His image.

Careful boys will become careful men. Will you raise careful men? Ones who don't rock the boat, who play it safe, who don't take risks, who don't speak up, who don't fight, who are passive, depressed, and ultimately unfufilled? Or will you raise brave men, fierce warriors; men who are good, who are willing to defend and protect? Men who are bold, who lead, and who change the world? Men who have been stretched to the limits, who know what they're capable of, men who know that to trust an almighty God with their very lives and the lives of their family is worth the risk? Men who are willing to take that risk each and every day, regardless of where it might lead them and what sacrifices they are called to make? Those men are not careful. They are anything but.



Who is this glorious king? He is our Lord, a strong and mighty warrior. {Psalm 24:8, CEV}

"Safe?...Who said anything about safe? 'Course he isn't safe. But he's good. He's the King, I tell you." {regarding Aslan in The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe, by C.S. Lewis}

September 29

September 28

To chop my hair & donate it to Locks of Love or keep it long. Hmmm... Thoughts?

Also, can anyone tell me how to properly cut a mango? I peel it, which turns it into a slippery orb of death, and it constantly threatens to slide out from under my hand as I chop it, cutting my fingers off in the process. Basically, I hack away at it until I locate the skinny, long pit inside & do my best to get off all the fruit. Any better ideas?

September 27

Fun, busy day. :) I deleted the Facebook app on my phone {gasp!}. Life still keeps moving forward while I'm buried in my phone, & I'm tired of it stealing my time, joy, & focus. It's so easy to pick up the phone and click it open any time I have a "free minute," but those are minutes I'm not spending on things that matter and they tend to really add up during the day. I sort of thought I'd miss it, but I haven't. At least today. 

Have you ever tried to "unplug" before?

September 26

September 25: Thanks for Dinner!

I was crabby tonight. Not enough sleep and lack of time management produce stress, especially during the dinnertime hour, which has enough chaos of its own. And it's the kids who get the brunt of it. I get snappy and huffy about simple questions or them just being kids. 

I finally slowed down and apologized for my attitude, but the stress still remained, suppressed just below the surface. Instead of rearing it's ugly head again, though, it was obliterated by the kind words of a 5 year old. And let me first mention here that dinner sucked. It did. The garlic mashed potatoes were good, but the chicken thighs & spaghetti squash {sometimes trying new things is overrated} were not. We are not squash people. It's time to just embrace that fact. The kids were good sports and at least tried it. 

So after all that {we're getting ready to go to church, by the way. Gotta love that.}, Ruby clears her plate, looks at me with a big smile and says, "thanks for dinner!"

Thanks for dinner.

Never mind that I was crabby and snappy and ran around like a frazzled manic all the while I was prepping dinner, only to find that the product was sub par and kinda gross. Thanks for dinner.

A kind word really does turn away wrath. I melted at that statement & saw myself for what I was. I thanked her repeatedly for her kind words and for loving me when I was being so unloveable. Jesus had given her eyes to see through all the yuck to the person inside. May He give all of us eyes to see people as He does.

September 24

September 23: The Power of a Word

Words are powerful. They truly do have the power to build or destroy, to encourage or tear down. Words move, inspire, challenge, commit, validate, defend, or destroy people. Words can give flight to a dream, provide someone with another ounce of energy to keep going, or bring a life to a crashing hault with the utterance of a dark secret. One small word can carry a great depth of meaning and emotion:

Freedom

Death

Survivor

Love

War

Jesus

One small word can create action, even a chain reaction. For example, your 6 year old son tells the neighbor girl, who you have yet to meet, that he has a gun. He doesn't think to specify that it's a NERF gun. Again, the power of ONE word. The girl tells her mom, as she should have, and mom calls the police. Because, again, you have not even met them yet. They don't know that you aren't crazy, psycho killers. Although after that episode, I'm sure they'll have their doubts. The police come and knock on your door on an otherwise lovely Sunday afternoon and want to know why your son is threatening to shoot the neighbor girl with a gun. You and Daddy have more then one word with him about all that.

One small word can be powerful enough to change a life. I don't know that I think about that when I let words just fall out of my mouth each day. It's so easy to speak without thinking, especially when I'm angry. It's also easy to jabber on about worthless things. Scientists say that the average woman uses 20,000 words each day, which is 13,000 more then your average man. The passage from Luke 12:35-48 comes to mind: "From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked." Could this be applied to our words, especially as women? I think so.

God has given us a finite word quota each day: am I using them wisely? Am I using them to build up, to encourage, to motivate, to love and validate? To give flight to dreams, to create leaders and world changers, to build up and inspire, to communicate authentic love and appreciation? To help you be the very best possible version of YOU, the way God intended you to be, this side of heaven?

That's quite the challenge for all of us, and it should be. Words are important. They're life-changers. How will you use yours today?



Has your life been impacted or changed by the words of another?

September 22

September 21

September 20

Busy, fun day today. It was so nice having the kiddos home from school today, & they really seemed to enjoy it, too! Getting the very last of our stuff moved, finally. Great dinner with friends!

September 19

Carpooling is like a mullet: business in the front, party in the back. We stopped at a crosswalk with the windows open, and I swear that the crosswalk attendant thought I was holding them against their will. Lawd help me.

September 18

We went to the Westside Market again this morning, and I have to say, I love it!! I've been able to find a wide variety of organic produce for a good price & produce in general for an excellent price. I found this guy down towards the end of the main produce isle, & he's awesome. He has organic fruit, & today he sold me a flat of organic blueberries for $10. Ben said I should tell him that he needs to buy me a freezer next time because I'm not going to be able to fit anything else in the one we have. Haha. It is kinda full of strawberries... And soon blueberries. Whoops.

I noticed that there weren't any dinner pics from today, but we had pulled pork sandwiches {with homemade BBQ sauce}, cole slaw, & honeydew melon {from the awesome fruit guy--I'll catch his name next week so I no longer have to refer to him as "fruit guy"}. And it was delish. :) Because, I know y'all wont be able to sleep tonight if you didn't know what I ate.

September 17

If I had to come up with a joke about motherhood, the punch line would be "she tried to take a nap."

Ha ha...........ha.

September 15: The Perks of Primping

This week I rediscovered the pleasantness in taking time to get ready in the morning. I usually feel like I look as though I rolled out of bed and ran out the door, normally because that's what I do. I've had little ones in the house consistently for so long now that somewhere along the way I stopped paying too much attention to how I look. Sometimes because I don't have time for primping, sometimes because I'd rather sleep, sometimes because I didn't get any sleep, and sometimes because I'm just lazy and don't care. Yoga pants and a top knot, here I come! I would see these other women {some with small children, as well} out and about and I would think, how early did you need to get up to look like that?? I'm not a morning person, so that ain't happening.

BUT...

In our new house, we have a full bath all to ourselves in the master bedroom, which is something I've NEVER had before. We've been happy with more then one toilet, but a second shower in the house is a first for us. AND it has a double sink. And drawers for storage. I die. And it's in our room, which has a lock on the door, so that means no little fingers getting into my make-up, nail polish, and whatnot. At least not nearly as often. I have my own space, which I suppose I'll share with my husband. :) 

I was going to a mom's group one day this week, and after I dropped the bigs off at school I decided I should stop back at home and try to look presentable. You know, get out of my "mom clothes" and put on a little mascara. So I got the littles a snack, put on a video, and went upstairs to get ready. After perusing through my closet for much too long, I finally decided on something to wear that was a notch above mom clothes {aka, leggings}. I went to my bathroom sink, opened the drawer, took out my make-up bag, and started on the bags under my eyes, which, by the way, I hadn't noticed were there until that point. Funny what happens when you actually look in a mirror.

And I noticed something. It was quiet. And peaceful. Just me, my thoughts, and my make-up {and some strange woman staring back at me in the mirror}. And the quietness wasn't because the kids were hiding in a closet somewhere eating a stash of candy. They were entertained for the short time that I needed to get ready. So THAT'S what all these other beautiful ladies have figured out! As it turns out, I can actually get some uninterrupted time by myself, in my own house, if I carve out a little time to get ready. And, I look good! Added bonus. ;) I definitely need to make time for this primping thing more often, even if it's only for a few minutes each day. 

September 16

Playing games, Popa, pajamas, pumpkin muffins, pink bikes, petals, pits of fire, & popcorn on the stove. 

Oh stovetop popcorn, how I love thee. I'm sure it has nothing to do with the fact that you're smothered in butter. And coconut oil. And salt. Nothing at all.

It's Almost Over...

My sweet little Eva will be ten months old in a week. Ten months have flown by since she was born last year on a chilly Wednesday, the day before Thanksgiving. I woke up with contractions that morning along with some discomfort, but I didn't think much of it because that seemed to be the norm at that point in my pregnancy. And it was still a few days early after all--I hadn't yet exceeded my due date as I had with the other kids. A busy day of pie making in preparation for our traditional "pie breakfast" on Thanksgiving morning waited in my future, and I was eager to get baking as I had literally been craving the peaches & cream pie since July. Babies come when they want to come, however, and arrive she did. 'Twas the night before Thanksgiving and Daddy and I were in the hospital holding our brand new baby girl. 

As I snuggled her this week and thought about how much she's grown and changed, I realized that it's almost over. Our baby years, that is. I spent so many years wondering what our family would look like. Would God choose to bless us with children? And would that road be easy, or would it be riddled with infertility or loss? How many kids would we have? Would they be boys, girls, or a mix? What would we choose to name them? What would they look like? Would they be born healthy? Would I be able to love more then one child, and love them all the same? So many questions, so many unknowns.

And now here we are. I knew there would come a day when we would have our last baby. It would have to come. Someday. 

I love the baby stage. I love their smallness, their softness, their innocence. Their attachment, their dependence. All the firsts. That unexplainable, unbreakable bond between a mother and child. The privilege of watching them grow and change. Someday is no longer a distant, abstract day in time. It's today. It's now. We had our last baby, and now that baby is more of a little girl than a baby with each passing day. Her little legs that were once so scrawny are now long and chubby. She has five big white teeth that sparkle every time she smiles. She says "Da-da," claps her hands, and dances. She will let go of the couch and just stand there. It's just a matter of time before she's taking that first step. Rare are the moments she falls asleep in my arms with her sweet, soft lips pursed and long fingers relaxed.

Where did the time go? I know that I was there, that I experienced it all. I held her, fed her, rocked her, changed her, bathed her, and loved her each and every day. As the "baby years" are slipping through my fingers, I find myself wondering, was I there enough? Really there? In the moment? Did I love her enough? Did I cherish her, and all the other kids, enough? Was I paying attention? Did I count them as my most important work? I think so. I hope so.

"You will never have this day with your children again. Tomorrow, they'll be a little older than they were today. This day is a gift. Breathe and notice. Smell and touch them; study their faces and little feet and pay attention. Relish the charms of the present. Enjoy today, mama. It will be over before you know it."  
~Jen Hatmaker

As we enter the next chapter, I know that it will have blessings of it's own, along with more questions and unknowns. I pray that the Lord will help me focus on what really matters amidst all the distractions, and that with Him I'll be enough. 

"You are enough as a mother when you act like your Redeemer, dear one. When you talk like he talked, love like he loved, forgive like he forgave, and teach like he taught. When you launch your children into this big, exciting, wonderful world, that is all that will matter. It is what they'll remember and imitate. It is enough."  
~Jen Hatmaker

September 14

September 13

Bacon. It seriously makes everything better. Pizza, grilled cheese, & even potato salad. I needed a side dish for the community picnic tonight, so I decided to mix up my regular potato salad recipe by adding blue cheese & bacon. And It. Was. Awesome. I was secretly hoping the picnic would get rained out so I could have it all to myself. :)

In other news, when we moved into our new house, I asked Ruby if she wanted me to create a "rainbow wall" in her room, filled with rainbow pictures & art. She said, "I would LOVE that!" So I've been looking for some inspiration. If you see any rainbow artwork out there, let me know! 

The kids were excited to find hot chocolate at the picnic, stating that it was a perfect day for some hot chocolate to warm them up. And it was! 

How was your day? 

September 12

Took the new stove for a spin today, FINALLY!! You don't realize how much you use it until you don't have one for a week and a half. And how much you miss cooking and baking {never thought I'd say that...} Dinner was one last hurrah for the season, featuring the iconic Summer meal: corn on the cob, cantaloupe, roasted garlic baked potatoes, grilled chicken, and blueberry peach crumble for dessert. And it was good. 

PS, There are few things more precious than a sweet little girl with a love for rainbows. Ruby's homework tonight required her to draw more then three objects in the box. She drew rainbows. She was born with a rainbow in her heart, I think. Very articulate at the age of two, she sat on Santa's lap and asked for a baby doll and a rainbow. A RAINBOW. For Christmas. 

Precious.

September 11

Major accomplishment, & really the only accomplishment for the day: washing, hulling & freezing 32 pints of organic strawberries. I'm thinking we should be set for jam for quite some time! I got the four flats of berries for $22, which would be a complete steal for regular strawberries, let alone Earthbound Farms  organic!! The bargain hunter in me couldn't pass up a deal like that, but my practical side didn't interject about the immense amount of time it would take to prep said strawberries for freezing... Yikes. So that was my day. 

Thankful to live in the land of the free & home of the brave, where I can spend all day chopping strawberries without fear.

September 10

Went to Earth Fare today for the first time in a long time. I came across a 25 lb bag of carrots... I'm all about buying in bulk, but 25 pounds??? I can't imagine walking out of the store with that. I spent $50 on two bags of groceries (and I used a coupon). I used to walk out of Giant Eagle with a cartful for less than that. How the mighty have fallen... But I suppose when you're eating actual real food, it costs more then all the fillers. 

September 9

September 8

Ben & I were both sick today... All this craziness finally caught up with us.

September 7

Happy 1st Birthday, Sadie Monet! :)

September 6

Wow, my first post all week! We did in fact get ourselves moved last weekend and are tremendously grateful for all the people who helped! I've been wading through all the stuff this week, and it's taking much longer to unpack & get settled then it took to throw everything in boxes to begin with... But I figured I'd emerge from the rubble and share a few pictures. :)

The aftermath of a nice play date this morning, the new kitchen mostly unpacked & put together, Eva loving her strawberries, & my wall collage. The kids were voting on what to do after dinner {watch a movie or ride bikes}, and Clayton would encourage the baby to do a "so big," raising her hand, in order to gain another vote for his choice. Haha

September 2